selfie of younger me by Lisa Keaveney

Why do I hate myself for not being consistent? Why do I hate myself for not finishing projects? Why do I hate myself for not being a good mother? Why do I hate myself for not being disciplined in my health (workouts, diets, etc.)? Why do I hate myself for not being pretty enough? Why do I hate myself for not loving myself? Why do I hate myself for not being perfect? I could go on and on for infinity, but I won’t, you get the gist.

I know there are others out there who think one or more of these questions above. Yes, I used the word HATE. It is a strong word, but everyone uses it as much as we use the word LOVE or NEED or other strong words when we really don’t mean it.

Do we really LOVE spaghetti, or do we really NEED that piece of art? If we don’t get that spaghetti or that piece of art, will we die or fall off the face of the earth? Probably not. If we are not going to die or fall if we don’t get the things we want then ask yourself, “How will this impact my life?” and go from there. You are CHOOSING those things because you WANT them not NEED them.

I have come to the place where I ask the questions in the beginning of this blog less and less, but I still beat myself up for not being consistent even though I try. Most of the time, when one or more of those questions pop into my head, I counter it with something like, YES, I am pretty or YES, I do love myself. 

I also do the same with the questions directly above. This helps change my perspective. Perspective is a wonderful thing to implement in your life. I am learning this every day. Learning and perspective are daily progressions for a happier more joyful life. (In my opinion).

Some of these questions are jump starts forgiving and forgetting, like being a good mother, it is in the past. I can only forgive myself and understand that I DID THE BEST I COULD AT THAT TIME! Move on and do better moving forward. It sounds easy but it is not. What’s the saying; the right thing to do is not always the easiest? 

As I move through the journey of this lifetime, I am starting to understand, and it feels good when I have a breakthrough! I am calmer and understand a lot more than I did in the past.

I want this for everyone more than anything, but I UNDERSTAND that we all have our own journeys in this lifetime to go through. Our souls made contracts before we even descended on this planet for what our life path is going to be and what our life lessons are to be learned. 

I am not a believer in fate, that is not what this is. We all have FREE WILL, and we can go along and stick to the premade soul plan, or we can choose to go another direction once we are here.

I know some of you are rolling your eyes at me thinking I am out there. Of course, you are correct, I am a little weird but a lot of this is proven through quantum physics and epigenetics but don’t take my word for it, look it up yourself.

Thank you all for reading, I would love feedback, questions or comments if you feel drawn to do so. Checkout my website while you are here and let me know what you think. Remember, it is a work in progress, and I am NOT consistent nor am I perfect. Love to you all.

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